Thinking of You
by Reikaku Pyro
Summary: [No pairing] A collection of memoirs from several points of view. Mostly an exercise in firstperson and Soul Calibur writing.


_Author's Notes: Man, something NOT Yuugiou. Shocking, isn't it?_

_ Anyway, since I don't have a playstation or TV up here at college, my urges for Soul Calibur have had to be satisfied by character profiles and history, plus fanfiction. So of course, I had to give it a shot._

_ I was especially captivated by the story of Yunsung and Seung Mina. I always have been. But since this was my first attempt at SC fiction writing, I didn't want to do anything that really involved the nitty gritty. And I didn't want to get too detailed in case my SC history was wrong since I just gave myself a quick refresher for this._

_Also, I've never written first person before. This was like an exercise for me, really. I hope to write more in the future, but for now I think I'll practice getting into character's heads. WIth Yuugiou I rped all the character I wrote about with the exception of Mai. Here I don't have that luxury, so first person rambling seems like the next best thing. So I'll be doing more of these, probably through the eyes of Kilik, Xianghua, Yunsung and Maxi. They are my favorites after all._

_Anyway, you don't need a detailed understanding of what happened in SC II to get this story, but a basic idea of what happened between Yunsung and Seung Mina helps. Either way, I love these two. I hope I did Mina justice._

_Enjoy!

* * *

_

You moron. You brash, young, arrogant, stupid _idiot_. Way to screw things up. Running off on some suicidal mission was not what I meant when I told you to think things out. That's not what I wanted. That's not why I gave you White Storm.

And now I'm out here, looking for you; trying to bring you back. I don't even know why. I may not have been happy with how life was going back at the dojo, but I certainly wasn't looking forward to some wild goose chase to save your dumb butt. Ugh.

Do you know how hard it was to find another boat going that same route you took? Scratch that. Do you know how hard it was to find out which route you took? Let me tell you. Really. Freaking. Hard. About as hard as I'm going to punch you in that arrogant little face of yours once I _find_ it.

I can't believe I felt bad for you back then. When I saw you storm off after Hwang shot you down flat, I thought '_Hey, that poor kid. He's just confused. He feels like he's stuck. I understand where he's coming from. I should try and help him.'_ So I did. I went behind my father's back and stole the White Storm, thinking about how it had once helped me. I thought it could do the same for you.

…What I didn't realize was that you needed more mental help than either the sword or I could EVER give you. You freaking nutcase.

I remember how you looked at me when I told you about the sword. You thought I was crazy. Clearly I was for thinking an arrogant jerk like you could handle its power in a mature fashion. Now I know better.

When I said use it to look inside yourself and figure out what it is you really want, I had no clue what that would mean to you. Apparently it meant steal the sword, hitch a ride with some crazy pirate, and look for something that not even the dojo's most successful student could possess. But of course, you, a kid that hasn't even finished his training and with the attention span of a _gnat_ with an even smaller temper, could manage to find the Sword of Salvation and save this whole damn country, right?

Of course. Why am I even here?

Why did I volunteer to do this? Why is it that when Hwang refused to go after you, I said I would? Why is that when I heard what you'd done, over my anger and resentment for your betrayal of my trust, all I felt was loss and fear?

I tell myself that I just want to drag you back the way I was. I want to yell at you and see you pout furiously at me. I want to you to go back to being arrogant and dumb. I want you back there so I can wring your neck.

…Mostly, I just want you back alive.

How could you put yourself in _this_ kind of danger, Yunsung? What is there to gain? Honor? Glory? Respect? What good are they if you hurt the people that cared for you in the beginning? What good is risking your life? What do you care what people think of you? I'm respected. Revered, even. Not because of me. Because of who my father is. People give 'respect' for stupid reasons. You didn't have to do this to get it.

You betrayed my trust. You ran away from the dojo searching for a legend, thinking it would show everyone a lesson; that you'd have the last laugh.

No one's laughing, Yunsung. Especially not me.

Just the thought of your name makes me flush with anger. My mental image of you is sharp, so that the moment I see you again I can beat the living hell out of you and not even second guess myself. Every time I think I hear your voice my fists clench.

And yet here I am, and all I can think about is you. It may be about my utter hatred and loathing for you, and how much I just want to _beat_ you, but nonetheless it's you. No matter what I do, thoughts of you run through my head. Are you hurt? Are you safe? I practically twitch with anger, but there's nothing I can do.

I can't help but think it's my fault. If I didn't interfere with your brooding temper tantrum; if I hadn't shown you the White Storm, would you be asleep, safe in your room at the dojo? Would you still be sitting on the wall of the school, looking at everyone with that 'I'm better than you but I'm stuck here' scowl? Would you still be flushing slightly whenever I would tease you and call you 'kiddo?' You would've gotten over Hwang's refusal of your challenge eventually, so why did I step in and put these events into motion?

I'm going to find you, Yunsung. And to be perfectly honest, I don't know how I'll react when it really is you before me. I don't know if I'll scream and smack you with everything I've got, then drag your sorry butt back home. I don't know if I'll freeze up and miss you. I don't know if I'll break down and cry because you're safe, and then hug you. I have no clue.

I do know that I'm bringing you back home alive. Because something in my heart tells me you're alive. I'm going to find you no matter what it takes, and then you'll come back with me. Whether you like it or not.

* * *

_Author's Notes: Well...there's that. I hope it wasn't too cheesy and awful._


End file.
